This birthday should be great. I know. It's a birthday. But it just doesn't feel like it. I should be happy, new year, new beginings, fresh start and all that, but I'm not. It just doesn't feel like a birthday. I don't feel like a birthday girl, don't feel like it's a special day. It feels like every other day and that sucks.
It's early yet I know, but still it's how I feel. It's in the air, it's different. Maybe my headache is clouding my judgement, maybe not. Hopefully after I sleep on it, I will feel better in the morning.
Just once, it would nice to be TOTALLY surprised on my birthday. To be made a fuss over. To feel special. Just once. Isn't that what birthdays are for? And I don't specifically mean presents either. I mean effort. The effort that goes into making someone feel good, feel special or their special day. Like make their card. Or write them a letter about how much you appreciate them/the friendship you have. Something. Something that requires effort. And not simply stacshing money in an envelope and saying "Happy Birthday" like that took a lot of thought. Do something out of the ordinary that makes it a non-ordinary day. Something. Anything. Make a cake for them. Make a card for them. Write a letter. Take them somewhere, the beach, wherever. Just a surprise. Would be nice.
Maybe I'm feeling like this cos I know a certain a someone won't be calling me on my birthday this year to wish me a happy birthday this year. For the first time in my whole life. And that blows. And I should be mad at this person (I still am) but (sadly) this does not stop me from feeling like crap on my birthday cos I know this person is missing in my life.
I feel sucky. It's their fault. And they don't care.
Well, here's to a good nights sleep, some rest, and a new view on life in the moring : )
No comments:
Post a Comment